


You Broke All Your Promises

by QueenUndertheBloodyMountain



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Depressing, I made myself sad again, Sad with a Happy Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-16
Updated: 2015-10-16
Packaged: 2018-04-26 14:27:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 808
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5008279
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenUndertheBloodyMountain/pseuds/QueenUndertheBloodyMountain
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thorin remembers every promise he had ever broken, and every person he believed he had failed.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Broke All Your Promises

**Author's Note:**

> Un-beta'd, I own nothing/no one, etc. I also tried very hard to keep his age aligned with the events that occur. Thank you Tolkien Gateway for all your help with fact checking.

When Thorin was 7 years old, he accidentally tripped a dwarfling named Dwalin in his studies group and made him cry, he had never felt so guilty in his entire life until that point. To make up for it, he gave the other dwarfling one of his honey cakes and they became fast friends.

When he was 14, he made a lass cry by denying her a kiss—kissing girls was gross—and he felt guilty all over again with a tinge of shame, he had no problem kissing his amad after all, why not the little girl? But he found that he really just didn’t want to.

At 23 he made his mother cry by telling her he didn’t want to be a prince anymore, that it was stupid and selfish and he just wanted to be a regular dwarf; that was the worst he’d ever felt yet. He made her a necklace of diamonds and pearls that took him three months to save up enough coin for supplies, and she didn’t stop smiling for a week, those tears were happy and made Thorin feel a little better.

At 24 years old, just before Smaug came, he made his father and mother both cry when he said he swore never to be like his grandfather, who had fallen prey to gold-sickness; he felt very guilty then, but it was what needed to be said, and he refused to take it back. Though he was sorry, he still held fast to his words, his grandfather had gone mad and needed help.

At 24, one month after he said he refused to be like Thrór, the dragon came and destroyed everything he knew; after his rescue, the King would cry because Thorin had pulled him from his gold and from finding the Arkenstone. Thorin only felt guilty because he did not know how to help his sick grandfather, knowing the older dwarrow was no longer fit to be a King, nor was his son as he was weeping for the loss of his wife. Thorin’s determination would be a blessing for everyone, and no one ever witnessed when he would wander off to let out his own grief.

When he was 53, he promised his brother Frerin that they would soon be dining in the halls of Moria and made bets on who would slay more orcs; he had no idea that he would instead be burying the golden prince, alongside his grandfather and King. Thorin’s strength cracked when he realized that he had not even been able to tell the dwarfs that he had loved and admired them both, nor how much he cherished them, a fact that would haunt him with guilt and shame until his dying days.

At 53, just after the battle of Azanulbizar, he had to inform his sister that her husband had died in an orc raid, leaving her a widow with her two young sons. The news that their grandfather and brother hadn’t survived, only made the wounds that much deeper. He loathed himself for failing her and would carry Bíli’s death with him alongside that of Frerin and Thrór, after all, he had promised to keep his both his brothers safe.

At 126 he made his sister weep bittersweet tears when he told Fíli that he was the spitting image of his fallen brother, in personality as well as looks. He had not meant for her to overhear, but wasn’t sorry she did. Fili vowed to be a great warrior like his uncle, and Kíli was convinced he would wield a bow as well, as the middle Durin had, although it was hard to tell, the babe merely gurgled and waved Thorin’s bow around to the best of his abilities—Fili was the one who had to translate as best he could for the youngest boy, always knowing what was on the younger’s mind.

At 195, he promised Dís he would keep her sons safe and bring them back to her. On his deathbed, he could not help but reminisce about every broken vow he had ever made, and every time he had caused someone to weep in his lifetime. He had failed his people, his brother, his father and grandfather, his sister and her husband, and his nephews. After apologizing to Bilbo for his actions, he prayed to Mahal that he would be able to make it up to everyone when he met them once more in the halls of waiting.

At 195 Thorin II Oakenshield of the line of Durin, rightful King of Erebor passed into the Halls of Waiting, prepared to apologize to every one he had ever loved of how sorry he was for his failing them. They greeted him with open arms and bittersweet happiness, and wouldn’t hear a single word of apology from him.

**~FIN~**


End file.
